I Do What It Takes - But I Wont Do That

Sue Spence
May 25, 2023
4 min read

Updated: Mar 26

Reality is not Pretty

But I wont do that supporting major depressive disorder

The reality of starting a blog and posting my own thoughts out into cyberspace just hit home to me in a big way and I felt compelled to write this post.

I'd just done some research to join some support groups on Facebook and was struck by the way one post can lead to a downward spiral of negativity, each post and comment feeding off the other, with more and more posts then following suit. So now you have hundreds, and in some cases, thousands of followers of a Facebook page tapping into this negative vibe at the touch of a few keystrokes, and probably with notifications when each next one hits. This is definitely not the kind of support I buy into.

I thought it best to just set the record straight and lay out a guideline of what I see as being the kind of support I hope to offer through my blog and would want to receive from those wonderful people supporting me. I also am including what I see as my "pet peeves" from people who think they are helping but are actually causing more stress so that those who are new to supporting someone with clinical depression, or any other mental illness, can take note and avoid doing that. I can only hope that all readers out there buy into the same principles, particularly when commenting on articles and other people's posts. So here are the 10 guidelines to follow when commenting on articles and other people's posts from I Do What It Takes.

Break the Stigma of mental illness and depression

#1 - Break the Stigma

We need to be able to talk about our mental condition without fear of being condemned for it. When I was first diagnosed with major depressive disorder I felt guilty that I had brought it on myself and even had someone tell me that I was the problem and that once I got better, everything would come right. This is a medical illness that is not self-inflicted, so please, when commenting on posts, be kind and courteous of each other, with no hate speech or bullying. This is a safe space to be heard and where we can have healthy, authentic and expressive debates but where kindness is key, always. It would be great if medical professionals joined in as their opinions are more than welcome.

#2 - Be Positive

No self-harm or suicidal ideation comments or suggestions should be posted by anyone. If you are having these thoughts immediately seek professional medical help or counselling. If you do go onto social media when having these thoughts, I urge you to do so for positive reasons, and avoid negative sites. Lifeline South Africa can be emailed at info@lifeline.org.za, their website is https://lifelinesa.co.za and their National Counselling Line is 0861-322-322. Once you are on a treatment plan, I'd love to hear back from you.

#3 - Privacy

You are welcome to share my articles and website links with others and I encourage you to do so BUT part of breaking the stigma is respecting people's privacy, so please don't share people's comments outside the articles as these can be taken out of context.

#4 - Medical Advice

I am not a medical professional so I will not name any medications I am taking or give any recommendations on any medications - that is for the medical professionals. As I have mentioned in the article Top 10 Things to Know About Major Depressive Disorder, the condition has to be diagnosed by a GP or other qualified medical professional who will then decide on the correct treatment plan. Let's not share medication names in the comments and also not give advice on what people should be taking. We are all unique.

#5 - Religion

I am not a very religious person and believe each to their own. This is not the place to push one's own religious ideology onto others as we are all equally beautiful people with our own beliefs which have nothing to do with our mental health condition.

#6 - Discrimination

As I said in Top 10 Things to Know About Major Depressive Disorder, according to the World Health Organization, mental health disorders are 3 of the top 10 leading causes of disabilities in people aged 15 to 44 worldwide. Major depressive disorder doesn't discriminate so please don't be discriminatory or derogatory in your comments in any posts. We are all in this together.

#7 - Diet

Most sufferers lose appetite; it's a common symptom, so eating becomes a chore. I am stating a fact: I eat food because I know I need it not because I really feel like it. I can go all day on just a cup of tea and a rusk or two, but I know I need more than that to be healthy, so I push myself to eat more. It is hard though, and the conscious effort that's required to do this makes it exhausting. What we really don't need is to be told about every new fad diet out there that can be our miracle cure as our condition has nothing to do with an imbalance from what we eat, but a chemical imbalance in the brain. We also do not need a battery of vitamins unless prescribed to us by our treating doctor as part of our treatment plan as some vitamins can block the prescribed meds.

#8 - Finances

While in some articles I may share some of my personal experiences relating to finances, I am not a financial advisor and will not give advice, only suggest possible avenues to explore. It is also not anyone else's place to promote or advise through the comments section. An approved financial advisor's comments and insights are welcome, but individual advice must be taken offline.

#9 - Vaccinations

Whether we have been vaccinated or not plays no part in major depressive disorder so has no place for comment.

#10 - Relevance

Throughout my articles I will share content relevant to mental health but specifically major depressive disorder, and my journey of recovery and healing. Let's keep the comments relevant and to the point. If you share a link to another site/article/post etc. please state what you are sharing so that other users know where you are taking them.